It started in mid-morning. I tried to stay at work, but just couldn't.
I had Mary reschedule the patients (which I HATE doing). I could barely think, or stay out of the bathroom (if you're part of the night staff that cleans my office, I'm really sorry I did that in my trash can). I had to get home.
Fortunately I live near my office. The kids were in school. So I thought I'd be able to rest and be sick alone for the day.
Cooper: I am so happy! The Master! I must bring him something to welcome him! Here are Craig's underwear with skidmarks for you, Master! I found them in the laundry pile!
Blackdog: Stay away from him, you bozos. He smells bad.
Cooper: No! It's him! We must bounce in front of him to have him pet us! He loves it!
Snowball: He's lying down! He's wants to play! He wants me to jump on the bed and bounce on his stomach!
Cooper: Play! Play! Play!
Snowball: Look! He's filling the plastic bowl up with semi-digested food!
Cooper: Wow! Just for us! I love the Master!
Blackdog: I wouldn't touch that. It smells like Diet Coke and Corn Flakes.
Blackdog: No shit. Leave him alone.
Snowball: No! We need to cheer him up!
Cooper: I know! We must bring him gifts to make him happy! Come help me knock over the laundry basket full of wonderful-smelling sweaty clothes!
Snowball: Great idea!
Cooper: See! Look at them all over the floor! He will be so happy! Now let's bring all of them and put them next to the bed for him to see!
Snowball: Hey! A tennis ball! I'll bring that, too!
Cooper: Yes! I'll move the clothes and you bring more tennis balls!
Snowball: Yes. He is running... and tripped over the big pile of smelly clothes!
Cooper: Look! He's lying on the floor now! He must want to play!
Blackdog: I don't think so.
Snowball: I'm going to jump on his back! Ohboyohboyohboy!
Cooper: He's running to the bathroom again! I'll jump in front of him to play!
Blackdog: Alert! There is a man at the mailbox! We must let the Master know!
Cooper: Yes! Make noise! Everyone! We must warn him!
Snowball: Yes! Now! Lots of loud noise! I'll jump up on the bed next to him to bark, to make sure he hears me!
I'm SO glad to feel better, so I can be back at the office today. It's comparatively relaxing.